TASTE AND SEE

So Ive always thought about starting a blog, but it took some encouragement from a friend that I deeply respect to set a fire under my butt and to actually get it started. My vocabulary isn't very large, my grammar is horrible and sometimes my thoughts can be scattered but none the less, God is giving me a story. Day by day I am able to read one page in this HUGE story of my life that God has already written. I would love to share pieces of this story with you. I pray that in some small or large way my story will be an encouragement to you, that my testimony will remind you that you are not alone in this pilgrimage. 

I thought I would start off with a vision that the Lord gave me recently. I was processing with a friend about the facets of life, ministry, grace and satisfaction. All very weighty things so of course my analytical mind was on overload! haha. I was talking to the Lord one morning trying to process and make sense of it all and the Lord gave me a vision in my heart. If you know me at all you'll know that I cannot go a conversation without using a word picture to explain myself. I think a lot of this is because in many ways this is how God communicates to me. through word pictures. 

In the picture I suddenly saw myself barely standing on the shoreline of this eternally vast ocean called the wisdom and knowledge of God. Its sooo huge compared to our little minds that we quickly want to throw our hands up in the air and run away from this eternally vast ocean. As I was feeling so overwhelmed desiring to run away I felt in my spirit that the Lord was saying to me. “Jared I am not asking you or even expecting you to drink this entire ocean today. I know how small you are compared to it. Son all I am asking is for you to simply jump in the water. Enjoy its refreshing coolness on your skin and simply taste of its sweet delights today. You have forever to drink this entire ocean. I am not disappointed that you are standing on this shoreline. I am sooo happy that you are no longer running after that mirage, that illusionary puddle in the desert. Do you remember? I found you.. Deep within the desert place. You were so thirsty running after an illusion that would never satisfy. I rescued you. I brought you here by this ocean. I am not angry that you cannot drink all of it today. Im just happy son that you are here. having your eyes towards my fountain of living waters.”But then of course, the voice of accusation immediately comes to me and says. “Thats not God! Cant you see that the spirit of the Devil is trying to get you to be passive and to accept the false grace message.? Jared TIME IS URGENT! You wasted soo much time fooling around in the desert place. Now look, you’re barely standing on the shorelines of this ocean. Hurry and drink the water!!” Then, at that moment I was filled with the “fear of God” and started gulping and gulping and gulping the water from this endless ocean. This once sweet water was becoming  bitter and was making my stomach hurt. I looked up at the ocean and felt so overwhelmed that I barely made any progress. I then cried out to God. “Please forgive me!” 

I realize this has been my tendency for the majority of my life. I punish myself for being so small and weak. I gulp the water not out of love and enjoyment but out of fear and self condemnation. God is slowly breaking this in me. Do you feel like you can relate too? I am slowly realizing that God is not an angry God. He is sooo merciful and compassionate. All he wants is for us to enjoy Him. To be refreshed by him. To see him for who he is. A loving and compassionate Father desiring to be near to his children. Did you know that God loves you with all of His heart, soul, mind and strength? I don't understand all of this fully but he does and guess what? He’s not angry that you don't fully understand. Simply Jump in. Taste the delights of His love today. When you were going your own way filling your stomach with hot sand, God rescued you. He made a way. He DESIRES to satisfy your Soul.

Psalms 34:6-8 

“This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles.

The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them. Oh TASTE and SEE that the LORD is GOOD! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.